targets and feedback

Mr smith and Mr Ford completely slated us about the running we had in our film, so that's the first thing that we need to change. despite the fact that the film is more or less orientated around running, which is quite confusing. we now need to get some more shots as this would add more pace, as pointed out by miss Sutton from the library, who also hated our project so far. were not totally sure about how we can cut down on running, but with more shots we could cover for this. another point made was that the montage is quite unclear and seems slightly unrelated to the narrative, and being so fast they are hard to make out. the same shots are also used repeatedly in the montages over and over again, which doesn't really seem to work and in my opinion makes t look more like a trailer than an opening. another point made on the feedback sheet was that we need to be more careful with mise en scene, i.e. get rid of the clown. i think maybe we need to be slightly more careful about the running through the street, and then into the garden as the location seems slightly relaxed for this kind of narrative.